So there I was, stressing.
Stressing that the backing for “Hark” wouldn’t come through.
Stressing that we would not be able to get Jack the up-to-code crib that we had to have.
Stressing that I was going to bomb at my back-to-back weekends of ministry opportunities.
Stressing that I was stressed, because good Christians don’t ever battle stress, right?
So I found myself wishing that God would just dump all that I would ever need for the rest of my life on me, right here, right now.
Every sermon idea.
Every dollar we would ever need.
Every blog subscriber.
Every word for every book.
Every ounce of creativity, strength, and trust I would ever need.
And a never-ending bumper crop of the fruits of the spirit while we were at it.
You know what happened?
I got just what I needed, just when I needed it. Nothing more. Nothing less.
(Insert wild celebration here for Hark backers, the gift of a crib, wonderful weekends of ministry, and the very real presence of God throughout it all!)
But one must ask,
“Why doesn’t God just provide it all, for the rest of your life, in one flood of blessing?”
This question has tumbled around in my head many times as I have seen the bank account and the bills, the calendar of events and my energy levels, the blank page and a deadline…you get the point. We all have needs, and God has all we need. So why does it seem to come in trickles of just enough, rather than in one deluge of goodness?
Perhaps it is because God has a something bigger and better in mind than just meeting your needs.
God desires intimacy with us; He desires to tackle this life with us, every step of the way. He desires to point out wonder and beauty along the way, and to help us navigate every twist and turn the journey takes.
Honestly, that awesome stuff probably wouldn’t happen if God had just made one huge deposit into my “Life’s Needs Bank Account” when I was a young believer. Sure, I would have been grateful in the moment, but I quickly would have left God out of it.
God knows that left to our own devices, we hoard, become proud, and take credit where credit is not due.
We need years of dependence on Him to really get to know Him and learn to really trust Him. We need to experience the “just enough, just in time” blessing in order to develop the depth of relationship that we were designed to have with our Creator.
There is an intimacy that daily reliance on God produces that winning the “blessing lottery” never would.
So if you too find yourself in a place of stress, recognize it for what it really can be – a place of leaning into God in such a way that you will forge priceless intimacy with Him.
Take heart! As you lean on Him, He will provide. He is trustworthy. He is good. He has you. So enjoy the journey; enjoy every moment and allow your love and trust to deepen, day by day.